Happy days die...but some survive

I don't know, if you'll ever read this. Maybe I don't even want you to do. But something's happening to me and you are the only one I could tell about it. I dreamed about you last night and this dream scares me that much, I just have to write you. Because in my dream I definitely lost you. Besides I got the feeling of losing myself. Yesterday, he beat me again. It was not the first time. And I know, you are left in disbelief that I let this happen to me, I also can't understand it. And I know, you don't want to be involved into this situation, but it is more complicated than you think. I love him. That sounds so ridiculous and weak, but its enough for me to hold on. But tonight I am at my wits' end.. I am sunk. He really hurt me, brothers. It's still hurting...